Hi, I'm Julie Tietz, and welcome to Conflict Resolution-- Putting the Pieces Together. Today we're going to talk about gender and different conflict styles that are strongly associated with women and men. In conflict styles and gender, there are expectations on how people are supposed to behave in a conflict, and there are common associations between males and females-- so how men are supposed to act in a conflict and how women are supposed to act in a conflict.
In the United States culture, men are often perceived as having a competing conflict style, whereas women are more accommodating avoiding and compromising in their conflict styles. There is a gender-neutral conflict style known as collaborating. Let's take a closer look at these conflict styles a little bit further and how they are associated with males and females.
So in the competing style, again, it's associated with men or males. And here, we are expecting the male to have their needs above others. So their needs are more important than others, and this is often also referred to as forcing. So in the United States culture and conflict, we expect men to have that competitiveness and that force when they're in conflict.
Accommodating is associated with females, and here, we see the individual working to help the other party meet their needs above their own or at the expense of their own needs. And compromising, also a female conflict style or associated with females, here we see the individual sacrificing some of their needs to accommodate others or to allow others to have their needs met.
Avoiding, also considered a female conflict style in the United States, it means that the conflict is not being addressed. So they don't make any attempt to resolve the conflict or address it. It's basically ignoring that the conflict has even happened. And then again, we have collaborating, which is considered a gender-neutral conflict style within the United States. And here, the parties work to meet everybody's needs involved. It's also-- or can also be considered problem-solving.
According to our specific culture and our gender expectations, we normally will act according to those expectations assigned to our gender by our culture. So what is right, proper, or correct to act and behave. And we do this out of a sense of identity. Because our gender is a part of forming our sense of self and identity, we have a hard time moving away from that, and so we choose to and typically act according to these expectations.
Also, we do this to meet cultural norms, to be a part of our culture and to meet their expectations. And we do this or we act according to these expectations even if it means our needs are not being met or they will not be met. So for example, let's say that there is a conflict in the work schedule, and they need somebody to fill a spot on a day that I had something really exciting planned with friends and family. So me being female and wanting to act according to my gender expectations of my culture, I may adopt an accommodating style and agree to take on that shift rather than fulfilling my needs of having social time and fulfilling my relationships with friends and family.
Also, when we act outside of our gender conflict style, this may create cognitive dissonance. So here we are holding or having feelings or situations that are incompatible with our thoughts or beliefs. So we encounter a man in conflict and we are expecting him to be foreseeing and competing, but rather, he is showing a more avoidant or a compromising or maybe accommodating conflict style, and our minds are having a hard time balancing this out because he's supposed to be one thing but he's acting in another way, so what am I supposed to do? And this can be a really big state of discomfort for people when they experience individuals acting outside their gender conflict style.
Let's check out our key points on gender and conflict style. Each culture has gender-appropriate conflict styles. So males and females are expected to act in conflict in a certain way. And in the United States, males are supposed to act according to their gender-expected style in a competing or forcing way, whereas females are expected to act in a way that is avoidant, accommodating, or compromising.
And when individuals act outside of their expected style, it can create cognitive dissonance for those in conflict and a state of discomfort because they are witnessing or feeling two or more incompatible thoughts or beliefs that they have surrounding gender and conflict style.
Here are your key terms before we go, feel free to pause and look at them a little bit closer. I am going to move on to another slide. Thanks for taking the time out, and I can't wait to catch you again next time.