As you learned in a previous lesson, the pre-conflict stage is when an issue may be brewing, but you're not really aware of what it is. Then, of course, there's the actual conflict stage, which has several more specific stages within it.
The first of these is discomfort, or the feeling that something is wrong. Following discomfort is the incident stage, where something either minor or major happens to bring the conflict out in the open. Next often comes the misunderstanding stage, which leads to tension and then full-blown crisis.
Finally, there is the resolution stage, which is a deliberate action or group of actions to help parties meet their respective needs. When it is successful, resolution leads to post-conflict, or the relationship between parties after a conflict has been resolved.
A conflict does not have to go through all the stages before reaching resolution and post-conflict; for example, a successful intervention at the discomfort level can lead straight from discomfort down to post-conflict. Resolution can happen at any stage:
EXAMPLE
Discomfort stage: Let's say you and a group of friends have been planning a surprise party for another friend. You have all divvied up the tasks, but you're starting to feel a little uncomfortable because people aren't keeping up their part of the bargain. You feel like you are the one that's doing most of the organizing.EXAMPLE
Misunderstanding stage: You have been getting a lot of extra work at your job; there’s a new deadline, and the emails have been pouring in. There’s one coworker that keeps sending you emails that sound a little harsh, saying things like, "Action requested. Do this now. Where is that? I expect this by the end of the day."As we’ve discussed before, the various stages of conflict can be revisited at any point during the conflict; a conflict can escalate or de-escalate, depending on whether or not a resolution is complete.
With escalation, a conflict moves from a less intense or harmful stage to a more intense or harmful stage. For example, an escalating conflict might move from discomfort to misunderstanding and tension.
De-escalation would be the opposite; this is the movement of a conflict from a more harmful or intense stage to a less intense or harmful one.
EXAMPLE
You clear up a misunderstanding. Things are completely solved, but you move back to feeling just a little uncomfortable. The escalation and de-escalation can continue to happen during this stage of a conflict.EXAMPLE
If you called the police on your neighbor's party, that would be an escalation of the conflict. If you decided to invest in better sound-proofing for your windows so that the party noise would bother you less, that would be a de-escalation of the conflict.Source: Adapted from Sophia tutorial by Marlene Johnson.